Heaven's Angels

I was reading a post on Facebook the other day from a woman who had just recently adopted a baby. She was full of joy, and rightly so. This baby is really cute. And I am sure she had been waiting and wanting for her for what probably seemed like forever. But, the part that sent me into full ponder mode, was when she gave thanks to the people who had helped her achieve motherhood.  They were people who had passed on and were guiding her from heaven.

Hmmm. That's a really nice thought. But what doesn't make sense is that The Bible tells us that once we get to heaven, there will be no more tears, no more sorrow (Revelations 21:4). I can't help but believe that if you were able to look down from heaven, all you'd do is cry. Seeing all the people who are lost, hurt, sick, angry, even evil.  All those people you love, struggling day in and day out with living in a world run by The Prince of Darkness. 

I used to have dreams that my dad didn't really die. In my dreams he would give me advice and tell me comforting things. I would always wake up feeling like I'd been imparted with some sort of wisdom; feeling like I had an invisible protector with wings.  Then I'd get out his old letters to me. I'd read the one he wrote me when I had my head in the sand and needed a swift kick in the pants. I'd read and re-read the one about how he and mom missed me and my face.  The one about how the weather was hot and beans were for dinner made me smile. Just hearing his "voice" talk about the day-to-day business of life was like a warm blanket.

So, while thinking that those we loved who have passed are now our guardian angels, is a romantic notion and certainly one I used to indulge myself in, it's out of line with what The Big Man says. That no one will feel sorrow, or pain. What a relief that God has left me letter after letter with wisdom, and daily kicks in the pants, and comfort and hope. What a relief that my dad doesn't see this broken world any more. What a relief My Father in Heaven is holding my dad.

Heavenly Marriage?

Today, I found out that a classmate of mine from high school passed away. She was 37 years old. She left behind 4 kids. It's hard not to see your own family in a similar scenario when a friend your age dies.  I was telling Troy about her and said that I couldn't imagine raising our two alone and how hard it would be to grieve and at the same time be supportive and comforting to 4 children.

Of course, when you are not in that situation, it is easy to say things like: Honey, you can re-marry, like...ten years after I die.  But that got me to wondering. How does it work in heaven? If I die, and Troy re-marries, do we get to be married in Heaven? Are people married in heaven? What if he takes a second wife, who had never been married. When they go, do I get to live with him because he was mine first? Do I have to share him? Do we all have our own apartments?  I know we all just love God and Jesus, so are we married to Him. Does that mean romantic love is done?

I don't know. If you know anything biblically based about this, please leave a comment. I'd love to hear it.

Nudging

I've had this "nudging" feeling for a while to start writing about my faith.  About what I am learning. About how I am evolving. About how none of it is about me, but how I am being used. Addressing misconceptions I have had about being a Christian and personal struggles I have with what I believe. I've been wanting to write about joy and pain and comfort and suffering and hope and torment within the realm of practicing Christianity.

Last night I went to a ladies get together at our church. It was a little gathering to talk about classes and mentoring groups you could sign up for this Fall, followed by a short lecture titled Life Beyond Laundry - Completing What God Has Prepared For You.

The teacher opened with this:  "For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them."  Eph 2:10

Let's be real people. Sometimes I can read a bible verse over and over and not get what it means. And this is one of them. It seems simple enough. Do good works. Ok. Sure. Whatever that means. Wait, what does it mean?

It took a minute, but I get it now.  God created me, and gave me gifts to use. He's already prepared the way for me. He's given me the tools. But now I have to pick up the tools and really use them. And not just for my own fame and glory, but so people would know God and how good he is.

So, here we go. This new blog. I've got the tools (a laptop and a typing skills and a love for God) and now I've just got to use them so that when you read this blog, you see God's love and grace and not Nikki.